


Demons and Knights

by RuddiestBubbles



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Closer look at relationships, M/M, character study(kinda), mentions of OD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 03:09:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10152110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RuddiestBubbles/pseuds/RuddiestBubbles
Summary: He fell. He fell hard. It wasn’t a proud moment, like a fallen warrior protecting his king. No, this was a fall from a weakness too strong to overcome. He didn’t know how to handle it, not sure what was too much-- too far, too hard. He had big shoes to fill, and dragons to slay. But his demons were far too many to battle alone, yet he was too scared to ask for help.





	

Kent Parson was a demon and a knight in shining armor. He knew all of Jack’s darkest secrets, and he helped, and shoved him farther under the drowning waters of anxiety. Back when Jack met Kent in the Q, it was a simple friendship. They both didn’t have any friends, and both demons that clung to their souls and clawed at their necks. Some point along the way, definitely after some sort of party with alcohol-- not long after their first real game-- they found themselves behind a locked door. Quick, sloppy jerks and hot open mouthed kisses; dirty, alcohol driven, messy first time. It was so much from the build up of everything as it was the alcohol. 

 

Jack’s anxiety was rearing in full force, especially with his father’s shadow constantly looming over him. All eyes were on him, forever on him. HIs every single step was criticized, from the way he let his hair grow all shaggy, to the way he still had so much of his baby fat and he wasn’t a perfect specimen of of human much like his mother and father. But Kent, well, he was truly Jack’s knight in shining armor. He made all of that pain go, through hot touches and dirty kisses. Kent made Jack feel wanted, like maybe his imperfect body was actually something that someone wanted, even if it was only ever behind a locked door, stowed away from the prying eyes of the world and their judgmental daggers of words.

 

Out of those rooms, away from the secureness of a locked door, Jack was so, so alone. Kent was there, but not in the way Jack needed. Kent couldn’t give Jack what he needed, not when all eyes were on the best duo the hockey world had ever seen. Not when they lived in a world where being anything but straight was a downright sin. The medicine helped. If only for a while. It calmed the world, let him breath air that didn’t feel like cotton. But maybe that was the problem, it was too calm. That got under his skin, ate away at his sanity. He was anxious, and the medicine makes him calm, but that only results in a clear mind to run itself in circles. 

 

Living away from his parents was rough. Even though he visited often-- every chance he got really-- he felt like their already opaque relationship was growing thinner and more fraut. Especially when Kent went home with him one break-- his mom was in one of her worst slumps yet. They hadn’t meant to do it, not really, not when Jack’s parents were home. It was an overwhelming amount of stress and a whirlwind of anxiety that brought them both panting and writhing away because of one simple touch from each other. Jack could feel the worried glares directed at the back of his head. His maman couldn’t look either of the boys in the eyes for an entire day. His papa bit his lip and clapped Jack on the back before disappearing out the front door in his tigh running clothes and bright yellow trainers. 

 

After Kent flew back home, Maman and Papa had sat Jack down at the kitchen table, worried blue and brown eyes boring holes through his opaque screen of resilience. His droopy sad blue eyes just couldn’t look at either of his parents, so he stared at the table, his shaking hands in fists to keep from roughly pulling at his hair.

 

“Jack, honey.” Maman started, and that’s all it took for Jack’s wall to tumble down, a crumbled pile of lies on the ground. 

 

“I’m sorry!” He sobbed, his eyes glassy and sad. “I don’t know what I’m doing…. I-I don’t know….” It was loud at first, but his voice trailed off until it dropped of the edge of audible and into a sub-conscious string of  _ I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.  _ His hands flew to his hair and he gripped at the long shaggy hair.

 

“Oh Jacques, my baby.” Maman said quietly, gently taking Jack’s wrists, rubbing slow circles into the taught muscles. “We’re not upset. There’s nothing wrong with what you’re doing.”

 

“We just want to make sure you’re safe, bud.” Papa spoke softly, his usually booming voice now like a feather floating through a gentle breeze. “We just want what’s best for you. And if Kent is what's best, then we’ll support you.”

 

Jack did look up then, eyes red and brimmed with unshed tears. “R-really?”

 

“Of course sweetheart.” Maman ruffles his hair. “Now I wouldn’t go shouting it out, but you know, what you have could be good. Just be safe honey, okay?”

 

He actually managed a wet laugh at that. “As long as I don’t have to sit through ‘the talk’.”

 

“Considering yesterday, I don’t think you need it.” 

 

“Papa…” He groaned, head falling with a thud to the table. 

 

Jack’s relationship with his parents was still rough and communication wasn’t the best, but it was getting better. Well, it was till Kent and Jack got into a huge fight. They were each other's own demons, a presence forever looming and clawing at each other's throats. They knew each other's deepest darkest secrets which was truly they’re strongest front and greatest downfall. They knew exactly what venomous words to spew to drive a blade through each other's hearts. 

 

_ That’ll sure make your dad proud, huh? _

 

**At least I have the full support of my parents!**

 

_ Real funny Zimms, at least I don’t have to constantly take meds to keep me sane.  _

 

The words were poison and drove them apart. Jack grew distant quickly. He didn’t accept calls from his parents. He didn’t say anything at his last meeting with his team, just kept his head low and refused to give a speech when requested. Then in his room the day of the draft, he had just woken up and he was starting to get around when his phone buzzed. The dim screen showed several messages from his parents, thirty missed calls, and a single message from Kent. 

 

_ Hopefully everything goes well today, maybe we’ll end up great rivals on the ice. Good luck with your life, Zimms. _

 

It was the finality of the message that sent Jack reeling. He was drowning in the swell of anxiety that crashed into him, like the ocean upon a shore during a raging storm. He gripped the counter, knuckles white. One glance in the mirror showed him the sunken in pale skin and sad, droopy blue eyes. He wasn’t taking care of himself. It was starting to show. But he was drowning and gasping for air in rugged gulps. His whole body was shaking and his knees were weak. 

 

_ What if… what if…. What if…. What if…… _

 

His mind was running in circles, digging a rut in his opaque sanity. So he grabbed his pill bottle, popped the cap and took one, two, three. It wasn’t enough. His hands shook and shook and he couldn’t breath, not with a sixty pound weight on his chest. His heart was beating so fast. So he took another, one, two, three, four. His heart was beating fast, till it wasn’t and tiny blue pills scattered on the floor and he fell. He fell hard.

 

Recovery was a long process. The media lurked in every dark corner, tracking his every move. But his parents built a protective wall. That didn’t stop them though, not when everyone wanted to know where Jack Zimmerman went and what happened before the draft. Eventually the story got out and everyone at it up and spit it out with some new version of an originally untrue story. It didn’t help Jack’s recovery, not one bit. But he squared his shoulders, took a deep breath, and held his head high. 

 

Samwell was a big step in his recovery. He was a nervous ball of anxiety when he got there, and that continued for many weeks, until a mustachioed man approached him. 

 

“Hey Zimmerman you fuckin’ beaut!” 

 

That startled Jack. “Um hi, hello…. Euh?”

 

“You haven't socialized with the team yet bro! I know we’re both tadpoles, but come on brah!” 

 

“I just… euh… um….”

 

“Deep breath man. I know the ‘Jack Zimmerman Story’ already. It took the hockey world by storm, but you know what? Fuck that shit! That was before, not now.”

 

Jack looked like a deer in headlights, sad droopy eyes wide. 

 

The guy clapped him on the back with a booming laugh. “The name’s Shitty B Knight, and no that’s not my real name. Now come on, I heard there’s a Mario Kart tourney going on at the Haus. And yes, Jacques Laurent Zimmerman, you are required to go.”

 

“How…?”

 

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. Let’s go kick some hockey bro’s asses!”

 

“Oh… haha?”

 

They did kick ass, but only after Shitty ‘accidentally’ knocked Johnson's controller out his hand. And later that night, after Jack had awkwardly waved off any offer for beer, Shitty and himself headed back to the dorm, and they sat in Jack’s single dorm and talked. Or rather, Shitty rambled drunkenly and Jack listened, but it was great. That became a pattern quickly, except every long night talking started including far less clothing on Shitty’s side of things. And oddly, Jack was okay  with that too.

 

Shitty became Jack’s rock, he grounded him and brought him down from the ever imposing well of anxiety in the pit of his stomach. And eventually they had the ‘Jack Zimmerman Story’ talk. 

 

“Do you… euh, really wanna know what happened….?” Jack had asked nervously, his hands shaking slightly. 

 

“Brah, of course.” Shitty replied with a gentle smile and a hand on his arm. 

 

“Oh… okay… haha?” 

 

And after that, well, Shitty very quickly shut down anyone who even dared calling Jack an addict. It was the beginning of a ‘fucking beautiful’ friendship, and Shitty B. Knight became Jack’s knight in shining armor.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> yo, I'm on tumblr too, y'all should come say hi! I'm Ruddiestbubbles :D


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